Finding the Right Girl, Part II: She’s Not the Problem, You Are

Following up on “Part I: She Can’t Make You Happy,” Part II is here to give you the balancing counterargument: she’s not the problem in the relationship; you are.  It’s a humbling realization, but you need to make it for at least four reasons:

  1. God demands humility. Isaiah 66 says, “But this is the one to whom I will look: he who is humble and contrite in spirit, and trembles at My word.” Before the God of the universe, the only right response if humility.  We aren’t great, we aren’t perfect, we aren’t sinless – only God is.
  2. Forgiveness requires humility. Matthew 18 says that, when we go out and get angry at someone for wronging us, we’ve forgotten how much we’ve wronged God.  We’ve acted as the king on earth, rather than as his servant.  You must have humility before you can forgive.
  3. Honesty requires humility. Humans have no right to be proud. Looking at the sheer size, glory, wisdom, and beauty of God, we must repent with Job and Isaiah and say that we have no claim on God.  To be honest before God, we must be humble.
  4. Your closest relationships need humility. It’s a simple fact: the people around you most know you best. They hear your words, see your life, feel your emotions, and perceive your pride better than anyone – including you. “Faithful are the wounds of a friend.” When they see how you really live and want to help, you need humility. 

Gentlemen, the second thing you need to know about finding the right girl (and by that we mean, “wife”) is that she’ll never be the main problem – you already are.  The sin you and I carry around in our hearts is enough to tear the world apart. May God graciously gift us humility before Him and others.


About B Treece
loved by God before I ever loved Him, saved by grace alone through faith alone in Christ alone by the authority of the Bible alone to the glory of God alone, made to enjoy Him forever, happily married with wonder-filled children.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: