Loneliness, License, and Murder: One Woman’s Picture of Feminism at Home

In a 2008 article for The Daily Mail (UK), Rebecca Walker, daughter of renowned feminist and The Color Purple author Alice Walker, critiques her mother’s laissez faire attitude toward parenting:

I saw it as my job to protect my mother and never distract her from her writing. It never crossed my mind to say that I needed some time and attention from her.When I was beaten up at school – accused of being a snob because I had lighter skin than my black classmates – I always told my mother that everything was fine, that I had won the fight. I didn’t want to worry her.

But the truth was I was very lonely and, with my mother’s knowledge, started having sex at 13. I guess it was a relief for my mother as it meant I was less demanding. And she felt that being sexually active was empowering for me because it meant I was in control of my body.

Now I simply cannot understand how she could have been so permissive. I barely want my son to leave the house on a play-date, let alone start sleeping around while barely out of junior school.
A good mother is attentive, sets boundaries and makes the world safe for her child. But my mother did none of those things.

Although I was on the Pill – something I had arranged at 13, visiting the doctor with my best friend – I fell pregnant at 14. I organised an abortion myself. Now I shudder at the memory. I was only a little girl. I don’t remember my mother being shocked or upset. She tried to be supportive, accompanying me with her boyfriend.

Although I believe that an abortion was the right decision for me then, the aftermath haunted me for decades. It ate away at my self-confidence and, until I had Tenzin, I was terrified that I’d never be able to have a baby because of what I had done to the child I had destroyed. For feminists to say that abortion carries no consequences is simply wrong.

Notice all of the inside descriptions Walker gives:

  1. Feminist work was more important than caring for a child.
  2. The child was left alone to fend for herself.
  3. Her mother gave her neither time nor attention.
  4. The child resorted to middle-school sex.
  5. This led to middle-school abortion.
  6. Abortion “haunted me for decades.”
  7. Her mother was indifferent to it all.

Such parenting isn’t worth the vomit it causes in our hearts. Walker’s quote near the end sums up her argument:

The ease with which people can get divorced these days doesn’t take into account the toll on children. That’s all part of the unfinished business of feminism.

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About B Treece
loved by God before I ever loved Him, saved by grace alone through faith alone in Christ alone by the authority of the Bible alone to the glory of God alone, made to enjoy Him forever, happily married with wonder-filled children.

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